Relationship is often the foundation of marriage, as two people come together (relating) and eventually pursue marriage.

Having these sweet feelings or butterflies in our stomach leads us to a stage where that special one becomes so important in our lives and we just want to spend the rest of our lives with that one.

But can these butterflies sustain the relationship when storms come?

At times, they fly away and we feel empty and begin to wonder if marriage actually preserves the relationship.

Certainly, it doesn't.

Then comes the time when the passion that burnt, soul arresting attraction and all the spices that sweetened the relationship seems to fade away and you wonder, "what could be the reason?"

SECRETS! Yes, Secrets are a major reason for this. You see, sometimes refuse to relate openly with our partners in the fear that we are trying to protect ourselves not knowing we end up opening ourselves to harm.

Feeling vulnerable at this point brings a deteriorating relationship but the good news is that, when noticed by either partner willing to sustain the relationship, the candle can shine brighter again.

At this point, you may ask, What holds the relationship, Marriage or Communication? Yes – Communication does.

This is an act of exchange of information verbally (words) or non-verbally (gestures); feelings and gift-giving.

A relationship does not fall from the sky but begins with communication. This exchange is what leads to a friendship and probably, marriage. Real, open communication fuels and sustains enjoyable relationships. As the saying goes “the two shall become one”, we all know that physically it is not, only the heart that becomes one.

Your values are aligned together, ideas, goals and pursuit are all in the same direction and your decision making is now unified. This implies that continuous communication. This does not happen automatically but over time.

Marriage is a journey that needs the fuel of 'Communication' to survive. It is a journey of faith in God, entrusting yourself in pursuing the unity of purpose. In a journey, all you need to do is to move-on and not back out.

The preparation and the movement is always spiced with love, kindness, thoughtfulness and keeping faith in God.

In marriage, your communication matters a lot and must be in harmony with one another (both partners).

Wodi Awyetu